As a psychotherapist and wife of a sex addict, I have read countless books on sex addiction. This is the first book I tell wives to rush out and buy immediately! Until now, they all follow the outdated model, stating that the spouse of a sex addict is a co-sex addict or co-addict. This is the ONLY book written for spouses of sex addicts, disputing such a harmful label being given to partners. Instead it recognizes, and backs up with research, that trauma often mimics codependency. For years wives of sex addicts have been treated like they are also sick and must receive treatment for their own addiction and disease. This is still the prevailing paradigm. I hear clients tell me all the time the shocking things being said by sex addiction therapists who have clearly still not accepted the "trauma model" for spouses, introduced by Marsha and Barbara. I was blessed to meet Marsha, through the telephone, over three years ago, just weeks after discovering my own husband's sexual addiction. Although the book was not out yet, the research had been done and Marsha was a lifesaver as I carved my way through unchartered territory. Marsha helped me, and my husband, understand what I was going through. She normalized my feelings and played a critical role in my survival, and the survival of my marriage, during those painful first few months. Everything Marsha taught me, and so much more, is in this book! I have been blessed to meet Barbara more recently and she is just as wise and compassionate as I found Marsha to be. Barbara and Marsha, and their book, are truly gifts from God.